by Eleanor Gray
When I had my first baby I was the first of my friends with children. I had to seek out a group of like-minded parents in order to get any perspective on my experiences with birth, breastfeeding, and caring for an infant. That took a while as we had moved to a new city across the country when I was 5-months pregnant. In the meantime I read a lot, which is always my go-to when I don’t know what I’m doing.
Luckily, I received The Baby Book, by Dr. Sears as a gift. In it, they discussed babywearing. I had never even thought about it before then, but it seemed to make sense. You can keep your baby close and have both hands free for other things. However, I didn’t really think much about it.
Again, somewhat fortuitously, I happened upon a yard sale when I was about 8-months pregnant. I saw baby stuff on the lawn and decided to stop. In one of the boxes, all jumbled up, was a baby carrier. “Oh, yes, I did mean to get one of those!” It looked kind of crazy. I couldn’t picture how a baby was carried in it. But the woman who owned it assured me it was wonderful and that at $50 it was a total steal. I bit. (Thank goodness!!)
Fast forward to having a newborn and no husband at home. My husband was home for a good while, but now I was on my own with this little guy who really, really wanted to be held ALL. THE. TIME. What was I to do? I got out my octopus -looking carrier and checked out the website of the company and some YouTube videos. I got him in it. It was comfortable. He liked it. Holy-life-changing-event!
I became a dedicated babywearer, not aware that my son’s intense need to be held, probably signaled some sensory issues. I just thought all new babies couldn’t be put down, wouldn’t hang out in their carseats and strollers for more than a few minutes without crying. Everyone remarked on how good natured he was—of course, I was always wearing or holding him!
One day I was out on a walk on a popular path and saw a mom wearing the same kind of carrier that I was, and she was walking and breastfeeding—hands-free! My heart started beating faster as I flagged down this complete stranger (who was, remember, breastfeeding at the time) and asked her to teach me how to breastfeed in my carrier. She was delighted to show me. So began my journey of being able to breastfeed on the go. It was freeing and easy.
So, here’s my pitch for the amazing mei tai (pronounced “may-tie”):
• You can wear it with a newborn, baby, or toddler.
• You can wear them on the front with feet in when they are little and legs out as they get older. (This is important for their hips.)
• You can wear them on your back and get a high back carry, where they can see over your shoulder rather than being smushed into your back.
• Multiple people can use it and you don’t need to adjust any buckles for different-sized people. Just wrap the straps and tie and it’s comfortable.
• You can easily breastfeed while wearing it.
• The weight is distributed on both shoulders, which is good if you have any back problems and is helpful as baby gets heavier.
Drawbacks to the Mei Tai:
There aren’t many, but…
• You can’t use it to do a hip carry…not easily, anyway.
• When it is rainy, the straps can get wet when you put it on. (If you are getting your kiddo out of the car for grocery shopping, say.)
• It can kind of be balled up relatively small, but it is a pain to carefully fold it every time you get it in or out of your diaper bag. And it won’t be super compact.
Resources:
Thebabywearer.com is an excellent site where you can learn all about different types of carriers and how to wear them. There are forums for asking questions and a for-sale-and-trade board where you can drool over amazing carriers.
Many companies make Mei Tai carriers. A few are: Babyhawk, CatBird, Infantino, Pax Baby, Bamberoo, Kindercarry. Some of these companies are custom and hand-made. It can be fun to pick out your own fabric!
My recommendation is to buy one good one for the long haul. I look for wide and/or padded shoulder straps. A head cover, so you can support baby’s head when she falls asleep. And a wide and/or padded waist, which is more comfortable for you as baby gets heavier. A carrier like this will last well into the toddler years. It’s also easy with some companies to order extra long straps for plus-size mamas. Even with longer straps it should be easy for anyone of any size to wear a mei tai.
A note on safe babywearing with a Mei Tai: If you are wearing with an infant, you roll the bottom so that the body is shorter. Tie it higher up on your body so that your baby’s face is still at or above your breasts. Make sure baby is always snugly against your body. When you start wearing baby on your back, have a spotter for the first few times you try it. Attend a local babywearing group to learn how to babywear or watch some of our upcoming babywearing videos.
